i sat in the bagel shop near my church on sunday, gazing out the window while i journaled about my week.  the scene outside was a little orangier than normal, and i noticed shadows hiding behind trees for the first time since i started my pre-paseo del rey ritual.  i had a sinking suspicion Fall had all of a sudden rolled back into the neighborhood, conveniently forgetting to tell us.

apparently the sun noticed too, cause he started getting off work early and going home… oblivious to my vitamin d difficiencies and tendency towards “sad”ness.

at this point you may be internally chuckling, thinking to yourself “man, this poor soul doesn’t realize there is no such thing as fall in san diego.”  well… i hate to be the bearer of bad news.

actually, i should probably say mixed news.

mixed news because, even though i miss the rays and fall (and his friend winter) definitely show up hear in san diego, i have lived enough years now to realize that seasons bring with them a little something special, an opportunity to wonder at the natural rhythms with which we live life.

dont get me wrong, im not exactly excited for fall–but it is a chance to thank God for the growth of this past spring and summer, and to allow him to again prune and prepare me in ways that are necessary.

i am thankful for the house i have now settled into, for the church that i call home, the plants i have learned to love and take care of, my roommates, the many books i’ve read, the students who have become friends, for the new ways i understand the the christian life, and for the ability to sit in solitude now.

i still see the need to be pruned in my critical/cynical attitude, the part of my heart that leans away from service, the fear i have of people, my tendency to do things on my own instead of wait for God, my choice of control over love, and the ways i hide (still) behind a false self because reality can be too painful to expose to others.

but hey, i guess that’s why fall and winter can be such longs and dreary seasons… so much pruning to be done  : )

so… as i wake up this morning, rain falling on the national city street outside my house, i thank God for all he has done and what he will do.  i thank God for the natural progression of life and for chance to enter into a new season of pruning and shaping.

prune away.